24 Wonderfully Ridiculous Excuses For Missing Work

We hope you celebrate your sick days in full style lounging around on your sofa with a bowl of popcorn and a wicked grin on your mischievous face you evil mastermind you! We've searched high and low (and found a little help from Twitter) to find the most wonderfully ridiculous excuses people might use for missing work… you know, in case you need some inspiration!

1. I can't come in today, I was abducted by aliens last night.

2. I can't come in today, the show I've been binge watching just released a new series.

3. I can't come in today, there's a family emergency…


4. Sorry I won't be able to make it in today, I'm protesting Mondays.

5. This probably won't fly too well with the boss:


6. I can't come in today, I woke up in a good mood and didn't want to ruin it.

7. I can't come in today, my cat has separation anxiety.

8. We can foresee this excuse lasting a whole four years…


9. I can't come in today, I just found out Beyoncé is pregnant with twins and I have a weeks worth of memes to catch up on.

10. I can't come in today, Netflix just added a new season of my favourite show and there's a healthy 12 episodes that need my attention.

11. I'm just worried for the well-being of my boss:


12. I can't come in today, I just hate being here.

13. I can't come in today, (or ever again), I've won the lottery and realised I would rather be doing literally anything else than working here.

14. It's pretty cold outside to be fair…


15. I can't come in today, I've come down with a pretty bad case of the hiccups.

16. I can't come in today, it's such a nice day and I want to enjoy it.

17. Hey, what's a guy to do?!


18. I can't come in today, I wont be released on bail until Friday.

19. I can't come in today, but I'm DEFINITELY *not* hungover…

20. I can't come in today, my legs have fallen asleep and they won't wake up.

21.Yeah I'm dead… but I'll be in tomorrow!


22. I can't come in today, my hamster unplugged my alarm clock.

23. I can't come in today, I forgot it was Monday.

24. Everyone knows not to disturb a sleeping dog…

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Annabel Usher, Editor

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